Harris Grill

5747 Ellsworth Avenue, Pittsburgh, PA 15232
Grade: B-


The most notable aspect of Harris Grill's men's room is the incongruity of the decor. I am not sure exactly what they were going for with the fleur-de-lis/giant mouth urinal/nice decorative wall tile combination, but if they were attempting to establish some sort of theme, it was certainly lost on me. 


No matter, though. This is not really a bad restroom at all, and I suppose the mouth urinal does fit in with the jokey nature of their menu (see: pretty much anything listed here). My only major complaints are that it is a little small, has more graffiti than you might expect and does not feel quite isolated enough from the rest of the restaurant. That, and it definitely doesn't seem quite as clean as it should be.

Consol Energy Center, PNC Legends Level

1001 Fifth Avenue, Pittsburgh, PA 15219
Grade: A-


Guest post by Chris Flyer.


I was fortunate enough to be invited to a Penguins game in one of the new Consol Energy Center's party suites. In addition to free food, an open bar, and gifts lavished upon us, I expected a glorious restroom. And while not bad, per se, I feel as though it under delivered in comparison to the opulence of the suite.

Don't get me wrong, if this bathroom were in almost any other building, it would be an A+ and perhaps one of the best experiences in my life. For starters, it was large enough to feel luxurious, but small enough to be intimate. Given the exclusivity of the suite level, you don't have to worry about any riff-raff showing up to ruin the experience. I only frequented one of these restrooms, but let's assume they are all the same. This given facility had four urinals and two spacious stalls. I was unfortunately unable to capture an image of the stalls, but let me try to paint a picture. Upon stepping into the first, I understandably mistook it for the handicapped stall, with its abundance of space and helpful hand rails. Imagine my shock when I looked next door to find  an even bigger stall.

The facilities were always of desirable cleanliness and were never lacking in paper towels, soap, hot water, etc. However, given the opulence of the suite, I expected more. Hot towels, attendants, mints, etc. Despite the luxurious wrapper, this was your standard restroom. In fact, it's a testament to the foresight of the building's designers that the general admission restrooms are nearly on par in terms of fixtures and quality.

Don't get me wrong, this was a great place to do my biz. However, I feel like it was a bit of a missed opportunity to do something really special. Needless to say, I will probably never be back there again, but the memory will last a lifetime.

Rain Lounge

218 North Franklin Street, Syracuse, NY 13202-1016
Grade: A+


NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

William F. Walsh Regional Transportation Center

131 Alliance Bank Pkwy, Syracuse, NY 13208-1297
Grade: D+


Another day, another below-average men's room in central New York. To be totally fair, I expected much worse. This is, after all, a train/bus station bathroom. But I did not encounter any babies taking drugs or sewer people, and in terms of bathrooms that are pretty much going to be nasty no matter what, it wasn't completely off the charts. If given the choice, though, I probably would not sit on any of the toilets.


A major bonus in a dirty bathroom is automatic facilities, and in that category this bathroom scores 80%, with an Xlerator dryer thrown in for good measure. The soap dispensers still need to be pumped by hand. Also, I think it's about time that someone invented an automatically lifting/lowering toilet seat. I would not want to have to use my hand to lower the toilet seat pictured below. 


There was a decent amount of garbage lying around: peep the plastic bag on the back of the toilet seat and the wadded up toilet paper on the floor of the stall. Several surfaces - the mirror and the chrome-plated dryer in particular - are covered with scratched graffiti.

University Building, 10th Floor

120 E. Washington St., Syracuse, NY 13203
Grade: C-


If a bathroom is going to be utilitarian and lack any sort of character whatsoever, all I ask is that it be kept clean. This one is clearly tended to every day, and it shows. Everything is manually operated, but the soap dispensers are always stocked and there are rarely any soiled surfaces to speak of (a certain Monday morning after a holiday party in the lobby notwithstanding).

But then it certainly isn't without its drawbacks. The water at the sink is always cold, though this can be somewhat excused considering it's the 10th floor in an old building. The knob is missing from one of the stalls, and while it still locks you can see straight through to the toilet, as pictured below. (A side note: oddly, dudes always seem to choose this stall first, though the other one is generally unoccupied. I have not yet pieced together why. Especially considering this next point...) The same stall's toilet seat has been loose for some time. It seems that it would not take a lot to tighten it. I could probably tighten it myself, but why would I do a thing like that? Also, one of the urinals does not flush very well, and as a result its water is always an unsettling shade of yellow.

The strangest thing about this restroom is that the men's and women's rooms, while obviously separated by their own individual doors, each lie at the end of a short, narrow corridor behind a single door marked "Restrooms." There is nothing quite like holding the bathroom door open for a female.

I feel as though I've been stuck in an endless rut of bland, average and generally unimpressive restrooms recently. Had I the money, I would take my girl out to some really fancy joint that would be guaranteed to have nice facilities just so I could write a gushing, appreciative review about it. Instead, I'll probably just walk into a nice place, go to the bathroom, flush the toilets, turn the sink on for a few seconds, take some pictures and leave.

Here is a picture of the secret 11th floor (seen from the 10th floor men's room window) in which a hobo may or may not be living:

Under the Sink

Grade: C-


Guest post courtesy of the mouse living under sink.

it's aiight in terms of places to crap but srsly what's with the skull dish towel? it's like 3 months past halloween right? whatevz i pooped on it

Al's Wine and Whiskey

321 S Clinton St., Syracuse, NY 13202
Grade: C-


Normally I don't come on quite so strong, but I'll just get this out of the way: I hate this bathroom. I really do. There is nothing particularly awful about it, and in all honestly I can't justify giving it a lower grade than I am. It's clean enough, I suppose. But for all of the kitschy library/smoking lounge decor in the bar proper - this is one of the only bars in Armory Square that doesn't give off a bland college, pub or chic ultra lounge vibe - the men's room seems as though it isn't trying at all. It's extremely dark, the walls are pained an uninspired shade of green, and it's disappointing that the sparse wall hangings are nothing but mirrored beer/liquor signs. Really? They couldn't do any better than this?


To add to the frustration, there is only one urinal and one toilet. On a crowded night, you're pretty much guaranteed to have to wait to use the facilities. And of course nothing is automatic.

Update 1/12: I just found a note reminding myself that Al's men's room is equipped with an Xlerator dryer. So my former statement about nothing being automatic is erroneous. Also, despite all of the hating above, I need to give at least some props in any instance of an Xlerator dryer's presence. Best inventions.