Emiliano's Mexican Restaurant & Bar, South Side

Grade: C-

Superficial decorative flourishes disguise an otherwise pedestrian - even somewhat rundown - restroom. One of the sinks has no water pressure to speak of, but the other is quite powerful and offers good water temperature. The wall paint has seen better days. The biggest issue is that the door takes a very long time to swing shut, leaving the back of the person at the urinal exposed to the restaurant for a significant amount of time.

Also: this is a (quite good) Mexican restaurant. What's with the Miller Lite poster?

Burgatory

936 Freeport Rd., Pittsburgh, PA 15238
Grade: B+

If you don't mind waiting 2 hours on a weekend night, Burgatory is an excellent spot to partake in the eating of creative/customizable burgers (mine was organic beef on focaccia with chipotle sour cream and avocado... right??), washed down with a cucumber/rosemary gin and tonic or alcoholic milkshake.

If you don't mind navigating the establishment's inexplicably slick floor through a thick crowd of people, you may even have a chance to visit their perfectly decent men's room. The facilities are decorated in a somewhat industrial fashion, with gray floor and wall tiles and a light fixture that seems as though it is made of iron pipe fittings. The glass/stone mosaic liner tiles on the wall are a very nice touch, as is the above-counter sink. The only real drawbacks here are the lack of a hand dryer and a proper, built-in soap dispenser.

There is something I would like to mention, though it is somewhat embarrassing. This goes without saying, but the usual labeling system for men's and women's restrooms is "Men" and "Women." Certain establishments do tend to get cute with this sometimes (take the Rex Theater, which instead uses images of James Dean and Marilyn Monroe to differentiate between its bathrooms), but generally it is spelled out and pretty clear. With Burgatory, though, I almost walked straight into the women's room. Their restrooms are marked with "B" and "G," which in retrospect quite obviously means boys and girls. Myself, having just imbibed one of these aforementioned cucumber/rosemary gin and tonics, first saw the "G" and took it to mean "guys" (the women's room is at the end of the corridor and is the first that is immediately visible, with the men's room only coming into sight as you move further into the corridor).

Don't ask me why I thought this; wouldn't one restroom being labeled "guys" mean that the other would most likely be labeled "gals," hence leading to great confusion in their abbreviated forms? Still, I did not immediately find the "B" and "G" to be sufficient in pointing out which restroom was which, especially when the "G" was the first thing I saw.

Anyway. I'm not sure the point I'm trying to make here. Maybe some readers will see where I am coming from, and maybe others will think I am completely daft.

Also -- if the pictures below are somewhat underwhelming, it's only because my phone is horrible at taking photos in low-light situations. And to say that the restroom is a "low-light situation" is not a bad thing; it is a pleasant dimness.

Wise Guys Comedy Show Room

201 S Salina St, Syracuse, NY
Grade: B+


Were it in perfect condition, the Wise Guys men's room would easily merit an A. The decor is quiet classy, with brass light fixtures, decorative green, red and white tiles, wooden stalls/urinal divider and nice wallpaper. Unfortunately, the facilities are slightly dilapidated and, as a result, feel somewhat shabby. There is a hole gouged in the wall above the urinal, one of the metal brackets securing the urinal divider to the wall has cracked in half, there is visible grime along the countertop behind the sinks, and the cabinet beneath the sink is missing a door, leaving the cleaning supplies exposed. I would like to see Wise Guys join the ranks of the true elite restrooms of Syracuse by clearing up some of these issues.

Rex Theater

1602 East Carson Street, Pittsburgh, PA 15203
Grade: D


While I'm feeling up to visiting painful Super Bowl memories, I might as well get around to reviewing the restroom of the establishment at which I watched the game. The Rex really was a pretty good venue for this event, despite the awful "sports rock" band that for some reason played beforehand and made us miss the pre-game Terry Bradshaw/Ben Roethlisberger  interview (and whose front man then had the gall to walk around shoving their CD in our faces, apparently feeling that their timeless performance warranted a record sale or two). Despite the disappointing outcome, it was an exciting game throughout, during which I of course enjoyed several bottles of IC Light. As a result, I felt compelled to pay multiple visits to the bathroom.


The first thing one sees as approaching the men's room seems to hint at promising, if kitschy, decor:

But alas, there is no such fun to be had within the facilities themselves. The walls are bright read and metallic colors, which is great for displaying the relatively sparse yet uncreative graffiti. The seat of one toilet was still lined with toilet paper from whoever had used it last, and the toilet itself either had not been flushed or was unable to flush. The hand dryer was non-functioning, and while it is clear that the proprietors tried to make up for this by stocking the place with paper towels - I counted five loose rolls, in addition to the one in the wall-mounted holder - the fact that these were placed on the countertop next to the sinks means that the rolls were soaked through and utterly useless in terms of hand-drying capabilities.

Undoubtedly, the most interesting aspect of this restroom was that both urinals were filled with ice cubes.  Chris (author of a recent PTDB guest post about Consol Energy Center) pointed out two things about this strange phenomenon: 1) urinating on the ice cubes at such a close range yielded an immediate misting effect, which patrons may have - though probably would not have - found pleasing, and 2) the presence of said foreign objects caused an undesirable splash back upon being sprayed. Ultimately, we could find no positive side to the ice cubes.

Rain Lounge

218 North Franklin Street, Syracuse, NY 13202-1016
Grade: A+


NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

Al's Wine and Whiskey

321 S Clinton St., Syracuse, NY 13202
Grade: C-


Normally I don't come on quite so strong, but I'll just get this out of the way: I hate this bathroom. I really do. There is nothing particularly awful about it, and in all honestly I can't justify giving it a lower grade than I am. It's clean enough, I suppose. But for all of the kitschy library/smoking lounge decor in the bar proper - this is one of the only bars in Armory Square that doesn't give off a bland college, pub or chic ultra lounge vibe - the men's room seems as though it isn't trying at all. It's extremely dark, the walls are pained an uninspired shade of green, and it's disappointing that the sparse wall hangings are nothing but mirrored beer/liquor signs. Really? They couldn't do any better than this?


To add to the frustration, there is only one urinal and one toilet. On a crowded night, you're pretty much guaranteed to have to wait to use the facilities. And of course nothing is automatic.

Update 1/12: I just found a note reminding myself that Al's men's room is equipped with an Xlerator dryer. So my former statement about nothing being automatic is erroneous. Also, despite all of the hating above, I need to give at least some props in any instance of an Xlerator dryer's presence. Best inventions.

The Syracuse Suds Factory

320 S Clinton St, Syracuse, New York 13202
Grade: D+


This isn't so much a proper post as it is a sort of a homecoming. I've been having problems texting pictures for some time now, and I've just worked around it so that I can get back to work. I assure you that there will be much more where this came from.


There's not much to say anything about the bathroom at the Suds Factory, anyway. Filthy, graffitied, missing a soap dispenser, no auto flushing or sinks, etc. The exposed pipes near the ceiling are ugly, but the exposed brick is a nice touch. I'm not going to give them too much credit for that, though. Also, a friend of mine said that he entered the men's room once to discover a man standing at the urinal and making... unpleasant noises. Sure it's not the establishment's fault, but you know. It doesn't help.