Monday, March 28, 2011

Dairy Queen, South Side

1223 East Carson Street, Pittsburgh, PA 15203-1262
Grade: D+

While the burger I ate at this Dairy Queen was a delicious pre-Super Bowl snack that gave me the energy to scream at the top of my lungs and drink a bunch of beers during the game, the establishment's dungeon-like men's room should have foreshadowed the things to come (Steelers :'( ). 

The restroom requires a key for access. In my experience, facilities that require the use of a key tend be those in which a person might feel they could go undiscovered for some time while a) sleeping, or b) partaking of illegal narcotics. While this is not necessarily the shadiest bathroom I have ever seen, it is located beneath the establishment and well out of the way of most customer and employee traffic. It would not be too much of a stretch to envision either of the activities listed above taking place here. Hence the key, I suppose.

Upon my viewing, the restroom seemed to have been cleaned somewhat recently. The toilet water, at least, still displayed the neon blue tint of bowl cleaner. But no amount of cleaning could salvage what is such a fundamentally dank and depressing restroom. It was cold. Everything is manually operated. The room is rather large but contains very little, lending to a strange feeling of exposure while seated on the toilet. There is no mirror, for crying out loud.

And back to the key. The key is used to access a door that leads into a corridor, off of which two new corridors branch and lead to the men's and women's rooms. But the door into the men's room itself does not lock. And as there are separate restrooms for the genders, I am led to believe that there is more than one key to access the restroom corridor. Anyone with another key in hand -- an employee, another customer, whoever -- could accidentally walk in on you sitting on the can. And you can't do anything about it.

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